Wish you all the best in the Year of the Horse!
Our family name FUNG consists of two horses. That means this is our year.
Dad
Showing posts with label dad's emails. Show all posts
Showing posts with label dad's emails. Show all posts
Thursday, January 30, 2014
Happy Year of the Horse!
An email from dad, in which he refers to how our name is written in Chinese:
Wish you all the best in the Year of the Horse!
Wish you all the best in the Year of the Horse!
Sunday, May 12, 2013
Dad Plans Ahead
Apparently my whole family is imagining scenarios in which I go to Eastern Europe and disappear. An email from my dad:
If you have the travel information such as flights and hotels you booked for the Prague trip, please email me so that we can keep track of where you are. In case you run away with a rich old man, we can go and look for you and claim our share of the money.
Dad
UPDATE:
Dad sends another email:
If you have the travel information such as flights and hotels you booked for the Prague trip, please email me so that we can keep track of where you are. In case you run away with a rich old man, we can go and look for you and claim our share of the money.
Dad
UPDATE:
Dad sends another email:
Just want you to enjoy your European trip. Be careful about your purse and passport. On Chinese TV, we've heard about two cases of a Chinese tour group being robbed in Europe in broad daylight.
Dad
Thursday, February 14, 2013
Fung My Valentine
I began this Valentine's Day with an email from my dad:
Hi Kids,
I just came across an oldie that I haven't heard since teenage years. It's like finding an old friend. It still sounds so good. Check the lyrics too if you have time:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?
Dad
While I grew up loving much of the music my dad listens to, I can't say that I'm a fan of this particular ditty. But I can see why the refrain, "It's true, good timin' brought me to you" speaks to my dad. He has always said that it was precisely timing that brought him and my mother together. Dad's visa was expiring, and he had yet to secure a steady job. Meanwhile, his mother was dying in Hong Kong, so he knew that he had to leave the US and risk not being able to come back. The prospect of having to live in Hong Kong, a place he had always hated, terrified him. Through family, he met my mother, who had a green card. After a 3 month courtship, they got married in Reno. He went to Hong Kong, saw his mother's passing, and then returned 3 months later to begin his new life. My father likes to say that he met my mother just at the right time, and that saved him from a life of misery.
My mother doesn't talk much about how she met and married my dad. But the pieces I've gathered of her side of the story make their courtship an utterly unromantic one. She had never wanted to come to the US or get married. To this day, she says that the happiest year of her life was when her ailing parents had been sent to the US by her sisters, leaving her alone to live as she pleased. Immigrating was very traumatic for her. A shy and sensitive person to begin with, she never could get over her inability to speak English and adapt to American culture, which she regarded as hostile. I don't know if she left behind a love in Taiwan. My aunt says she cried herself to sleep every night for a year. By the time she met my father, her life was confined to taking care of her parents, a duty she never complained about but must have also longed to escape. My dad, a graduate of UC Berkeley and the University of Chicago, looked like someone who could provide for her. With encouragement from her family (who probably worried about what other prospects a 30-year-old woman with little educational capital would have in a strange country), she agreed to marry my father. I've long known that their marriage was based more on security than love or romance. When I ask my mom what prompted her to get married, she says, "It was timing."
I often think about how much of my own life has been indebted to timing and countless factors beyond my control. The fact that my parents could settle in an area that they would not have been able to afford were they starting their life now, the fact that I went to college at a time when tuition was still affordable, the fact that my job opened up just at the time I was finishing my degree, the fact that interest rates were low at the time I bought my first home... All these things led me to where I am now, and they all have to do with timing.
When it comes to matters of the heart, however, I've never given timing much thought. I've had relationships end because I discovered that the person wasn't right for me. My own stupidity, rather than timing, led to those heartaches. Recently, however, I fell in love with a very good man who, due to what could be called "bad timing," had a harder time figuring out where I fit in his life. I may never find out if we could be very good together if timing were better, or if he would have turned out to be the wrong person for me regardless of the timing. Should either be true, I suppose I can try to find consolation in telling myself that the right person at the wrong time is still the wrong person.
But that's not satisfying either, especially when I think about my parents' marriage. I would never want to emulate it-- The differences in their temperaments, habits, and upbringings, would suggest that they were always wrong for each other. But in spite of the tensions in their relationship, they've managed to build a life together for 35 years and raise me and my brother, who both turned out as well adjusted and independent people, in a loving and healthy environment. I would stack up my parents' commitment to each other against any other couple that got together in more romantic circumstances. And while I would want more romance and affection than what appears to exist in their marriage, I have also come to appreciate more and more the loyalty, fortitude, and constancy that sustains their relationship and, in turn, our family.
So is it so much timing that determined their staying power, or the choices they made in the face of timing? After all, my parents could have each submitted to the troubles facing them-- Dad could have returned to Hong Kong and stayed there, and mom could have decided to return to Taiwan after her parents died. And at all the points of trouble during their marriage (the financial crisis of these past few years being one), either one of them could have made the decision to call it quits. Not necessarily for any better or worse, the course of my family history could have been entirely different had timing prompted them to make different choices. I would like to think that choosing to bear things together is, in itself, love.
So perhaps timing isn't a matter of "good" or "bad," but of how one decides to take advantage of it. After all, the person who's willing to stand by you at the worst time in your life could also be the best person to share it with. Maybe that's the upside of the rather depressing circumstances that brought my parents together. I suppose, when the time is right, I'll find a partner in life who will stand by me during good times and bad.
So I wish a Happy Valentine's Day to Mama and Papa Fung, who are always teaching me life lessons whether they mean to or not.
Hi Kids,
I just came across an oldie that I haven't heard since teenage years. It's like finding an old friend. It still sounds so good. Check the lyrics too if you have time:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?
Dad
While I grew up loving much of the music my dad listens to, I can't say that I'm a fan of this particular ditty. But I can see why the refrain, "It's true, good timin' brought me to you" speaks to my dad. He has always said that it was precisely timing that brought him and my mother together. Dad's visa was expiring, and he had yet to secure a steady job. Meanwhile, his mother was dying in Hong Kong, so he knew that he had to leave the US and risk not being able to come back. The prospect of having to live in Hong Kong, a place he had always hated, terrified him. Through family, he met my mother, who had a green card. After a 3 month courtship, they got married in Reno. He went to Hong Kong, saw his mother's passing, and then returned 3 months later to begin his new life. My father likes to say that he met my mother just at the right time, and that saved him from a life of misery.
My mother doesn't talk much about how she met and married my dad. But the pieces I've gathered of her side of the story make their courtship an utterly unromantic one. She had never wanted to come to the US or get married. To this day, she says that the happiest year of her life was when her ailing parents had been sent to the US by her sisters, leaving her alone to live as she pleased. Immigrating was very traumatic for her. A shy and sensitive person to begin with, she never could get over her inability to speak English and adapt to American culture, which she regarded as hostile. I don't know if she left behind a love in Taiwan. My aunt says she cried herself to sleep every night for a year. By the time she met my father, her life was confined to taking care of her parents, a duty she never complained about but must have also longed to escape. My dad, a graduate of UC Berkeley and the University of Chicago, looked like someone who could provide for her. With encouragement from her family (who probably worried about what other prospects a 30-year-old woman with little educational capital would have in a strange country), she agreed to marry my father. I've long known that their marriage was based more on security than love or romance. When I ask my mom what prompted her to get married, she says, "It was timing."
I often think about how much of my own life has been indebted to timing and countless factors beyond my control. The fact that my parents could settle in an area that they would not have been able to afford were they starting their life now, the fact that I went to college at a time when tuition was still affordable, the fact that my job opened up just at the time I was finishing my degree, the fact that interest rates were low at the time I bought my first home... All these things led me to where I am now, and they all have to do with timing.
When it comes to matters of the heart, however, I've never given timing much thought. I've had relationships end because I discovered that the person wasn't right for me. My own stupidity, rather than timing, led to those heartaches. Recently, however, I fell in love with a very good man who, due to what could be called "bad timing," had a harder time figuring out where I fit in his life. I may never find out if we could be very good together if timing were better, or if he would have turned out to be the wrong person for me regardless of the timing. Should either be true, I suppose I can try to find consolation in telling myself that the right person at the wrong time is still the wrong person.
But that's not satisfying either, especially when I think about my parents' marriage. I would never want to emulate it-- The differences in their temperaments, habits, and upbringings, would suggest that they were always wrong for each other. But in spite of the tensions in their relationship, they've managed to build a life together for 35 years and raise me and my brother, who both turned out as well adjusted and independent people, in a loving and healthy environment. I would stack up my parents' commitment to each other against any other couple that got together in more romantic circumstances. And while I would want more romance and affection than what appears to exist in their marriage, I have also come to appreciate more and more the loyalty, fortitude, and constancy that sustains their relationship and, in turn, our family.
So is it so much timing that determined their staying power, or the choices they made in the face of timing? After all, my parents could have each submitted to the troubles facing them-- Dad could have returned to Hong Kong and stayed there, and mom could have decided to return to Taiwan after her parents died. And at all the points of trouble during their marriage (the financial crisis of these past few years being one), either one of them could have made the decision to call it quits. Not necessarily for any better or worse, the course of my family history could have been entirely different had timing prompted them to make different choices. I would like to think that choosing to bear things together is, in itself, love.
So perhaps timing isn't a matter of "good" or "bad," but of how one decides to take advantage of it. After all, the person who's willing to stand by you at the worst time in your life could also be the best person to share it with. Maybe that's the upside of the rather depressing circumstances that brought my parents together. I suppose, when the time is right, I'll find a partner in life who will stand by me during good times and bad.
So I wish a Happy Valentine's Day to Mama and Papa Fung, who are always teaching me life lessons whether they mean to or not.
Saturday, September 15, 2012
Mouse Mom Democracy
Papa Fung wrote me and my brother an email with the subject heading: "Mom has guts":
Mom and I happened to pick up the phone at the same time.
Campaigner: " We're Republican.......Can I talk to C----, please?"
Mom, "I'm C----."
Campaigner: "The economy is so bad .......Romney.....Would you care to help out?"
Mom: "I'm voting for Obama!!"
Campaigner: "I'm sorry to hear that. Have a nice evening!"
I rushed into the room and gave her a thumbs up! The first time I saw her so forceful to say no. You know what she said?
"Do I dare to vote for Romney? Last time the kids scolded me for voting Bush." I call this mouse mom democracy.
So I guess the thumbs up belongs to you guys. Anyway, you should congratulate her next time you talk.
Dad
Mom and I happened to pick up the phone at the same time.
Campaigner: " We're Republican.......Can I talk to C----, please?"
Mom, "I'm C----."
Campaigner: "The economy is so bad .......Romney.....Would you care to help out?"
Mom: "I'm voting for Obama!!"
Campaigner: "I'm sorry to hear that. Have a nice evening!"
I rushed into the room and gave her a thumbs up! The first time I saw her so forceful to say no. You know what she said?
"Do I dare to vote for Romney? Last time the kids scolded me for voting Bush." I call this mouse mom democracy.
So I guess the thumbs up belongs to you guys. Anyway, you should congratulate her next time you talk.
Dad
Tuesday, November 22, 2011
Dad Puts It Simply
Shit's been hitting the fan at UC Davis, and I've been following the coverage pretty obsessively. In the last of the eight years I spent there getting my PhD, I got heavily involved in the student protests against tuition increases. My dad has always been supportive of my rabble-rousing spirit. Here is an email he sent to me yesterday about the most recent incident of police brutality:
The silent protest is powerful as orchestrated by Gandhi and King before. I think the students know how to use the power of shame now.
The Chancellor looks stupid too. I wonder how she got this job.
Dad
Sunday, November 13, 2011
Genetic Psychoses
My mom says that my dad doesn't understand her, but I think he understands her better than she thinks. Here is an email that dad sent to me and my brother yesterday:
Hi kids,
Mom got depressed these few days because her political party in Taiwan splits into two candidates for the upcoming December election. The result is that the opposition party may win as it happened eight years ago. The same stupid candidate split out from the party. He never learned the lesson. Mom keeps hoping that it wont happen.
Mom's depression is usually seen in her vaccuming the floor randomly. She also washed the dishes randomly that I found food stuck to the chopsticks and pans and pots.
While the Fungs are crazy, the Jairs are depressed for lack of control over everything. I just hope you don't inherit all the negatives. But the Jairs are easy to butter up. I suggest you guys talk to mom during this weekend. She will feel better after talking to you.
Dad
Mom got depressed these few days because her political party in Taiwan splits into two candidates for the upcoming December election. The result is that the opposition party may win as it happened eight years ago. The same stupid candidate split out from the party. He never learned the lesson. Mom keeps hoping that it wont happen.
Mom's depression is usually seen in her vaccuming the floor randomly. She also washed the dishes randomly that I found food stuck to the chopsticks and pans and pots.
While the Fungs are crazy, the Jairs are depressed for lack of control over everything. I just hope you don't inherit all the negatives. But the Jairs are easy to butter up. I suggest you guys talk to mom during this weekend. She will feel better after talking to you.
Dad
Tuesday, October 11, 2011
Revolution in the Genes
Today marks the 100 year anniversary of the Xinhai Revolution, which brought about the collapse of the last imperial dynasty in China. When I started getting involved in student protests at the University of California two years ago, my dad first told me that I have an ancestor who was prominently involved in the Xinhai Revolution. It seems only appropriate that I revisit that history today, not only because of the anniversary, but also because of the exciting spread of activism happening right now. (I'm getting involved in Occupy Boston.)
In an email dated September 19, 2009, my dad wrote:
I remember you have some revolutionary genes. Your great grandpa was a revolutionary. He helped organize the Chinese Republican Revolution in the south against the Ching Dynasty around 1905. The revolution succeeded in 1911 when China became a republic. But then the Nationalist Party (mom's party) became the dominant party with no checks on their corruption. Then came two world wars until the Communist Party took over in 1949. That was one of the darkest pages in Chinese history.
Your great grandpa's name is Wong Wai Yin. He is the father of my mom Wong Po Ching. He used to live in Canton. When the Ching government went after him, he fled to Vietnam where he married a third wife of Chinese origin (how nice!) who gave birth to only one daughter, who is my mom. He shuttled between Saigon and Canton many times. In Canton, two wives took care of him and provided shelter (how nice!). Uncle Gerard's father was the only son of his first wife. The second wife had no kids but was said to be very beautiful. He had written some nice poems to describe the second one. He also wrote something about the third for her ability to make plenty of money. I saw the writings when I was small but no trace could be found now. I don't know what kind of business he did but he obviously could afford three (maybe with help from the third one). How jealous am I! And how I want to become a revolutionary!
The revolutionary gene definitely comes from my mother's side. My mom is a small gentle woman so the gene was suppressed. It might have bloomed in me when I was a sexy young man at age 20 in Berkeley. But I was too busy to get out to make money. Now it's too late because I even want to make more money. I am afraid that the gene has the urge to explode through you like a volcano.
In addition, the Fung family carries the destructive anarchy/anti-authority gene that is obvious in both Yeye and me, and you guys too. The anarchy gene provides the twisted mentality and attitude, while the revolutionary gene provides the physical urge for action. I think this is a real deadly combination, especially exhibited in a female. Look at all the Fung females! I just hope that mom's obedience genes can provide some checks and balances. Else, I don't know what to do with you but pray only.
Furthermore, do not pollute Cynthia and Philip with your call for action. They've inherited these kinds of destructive genes through my sister. These genes may be dornant now subject to agitation. I don't want you to be the agitator.
Dad
Monday, October 10, 2011
Fungism: Tai Ching Cho Di!
My mother has an expression, which in Cantonese sounds like, "Tai Ching Cho Di!" It translates to simply, "Look more carefully!" That's the one piece of advice she gives in matters of dating, finding love and getting married. My dad, evidently, has realized how lucky he is that my mom wasn't so good at applying that advice to herself thirty-two years ago. In an email he sent to me and my brother dated April 20, 2009, he reflects on my mom's favorite phrase. I really love it on so many levels.
Hi Kids,
A sudden heart-felt sympathy descended on me when I passed by Home Depot and saw dozens of Amigos gathering at the car park looking for work.
Thirty years ago, I was in the same situation: no money, no job, no car, living with my brother in San Mateo. My situation was even worse because my student visa would expire in June. I could not stay because Immigration knew where to fetch me, while the Amigos with illegal status could just disappear into downtown San Jose. Man! I was in real dire strait! But I did not feel that bad because I was a happy-go-lucky disco jerk.
Luckily, a princess came to my rescue and saved me from this vicious circle. Otherwise, you guys were nowhere to be found. This makes me think that I must be an attractive sexy young man of great character. So I have to treat mom nicely by pushing less buttons everyday.
Anyways, whenever you find an attractive friend, remember to Tai Ching Cho Di !
Dad
Hi Kids,
A sudden heart-felt sympathy descended on me when I passed by Home Depot and saw dozens of Amigos gathering at the car park looking for work.
Thirty years ago, I was in the same situation: no money, no job, no car, living with my brother in San Mateo. My situation was even worse because my student visa would expire in June. I could not stay because Immigration knew where to fetch me, while the Amigos with illegal status could just disappear into downtown San Jose. Man! I was in real dire strait! But I did not feel that bad because I was a happy-go-lucky disco jerk.
Luckily, a princess came to my rescue and saved me from this vicious circle. Otherwise, you guys were nowhere to be found. This makes me think that I must be an attractive sexy young man of great character. So I have to treat mom nicely by pushing less buttons everyday.
Anyways, whenever you find an attractive friend, remember to Tai Ching Cho Di !
Dad
Thursday, October 6, 2011
K.I.T., Dad!
My dad often sends me and my brother emails that express his observations on politics today. It's kinda cute-- A way for him to do dinner-table talk while my brother and I are across the country. And we'll usually humor our dad by responding in kind, even when we're not in the mood to do so. This was my brother's response to my dad yesterday:
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